What If the Life You Want Starts with Asking a Better Question?

Luis A. Marrero
Jul 28
5 min read

“Knowing what is good for us has never been easier. Living according to that knowledge has never been more difficult.”

What if your bigger breakthrough doesn’t come from learning something new, but from seeing what you already know in a new light?

Take a moment to consider this. Many of us spend our lives searching for new answers. We read books, listen to podcasts, attend conferences, take courses, watch videos, and ask experts to remain current and solve our problems. We might be seeking a new idea, hoping it will help us be happier, build better friendships, become stronger leaders, or find more meaning and purpose in life.

As a lifelong learner, I recognize learning is important. And, if you enjoy learning as much as I do, you too have benefited from building yourself. But consider this: what if the breakthrough you want isn’t in more information or knowledge, but rather in how you interpret what you already know? This possibility intrigued me for years. So, I dived into fields of study such as psychology, leadership, and human development to find the answer.

Eventually, studying and deep reflection paid off. I had my epiphany! Humanity doesn’t lack answers. Rather, the solutions are ignored. If I can summarize it in one statement, it would be, “Knowing what is good for us has never been easier. Living according to that knowledge has never seemed more difficult.”

We live in times of knowledge abundance. Never before have we had access to so much information. Just think about how much we already know. We know that being friendly matters. We also know that forgiveness is a better option than resentment. We know that exercising improves our physical and mental health. It is no secret that showing gratitude and kindness has a positive effect on our lives. Many of us have experienced how trust strengthens relationships. The list could go on for pages. What I learned is that knowing isn’t the same as living—or practicing what we know. If it were, it would be easier to build healthier people and organizations.

Imagine if, with the snap of the finger, humanity suddenly were more friendly and humane, forgiving and compassionate, took better care of its health, showed appreciation more frequently, kept our commitments, quit being hostile, and proved ourselves to be reliable? Wouldn’t that be wonderful? Does it not intrigue you, then, knowing that virtuous behavior brings happiness, why so many choose the opposite? Read or seen the news lately?

I am not the only one talking about this gap. Back in 2000, Jeffrey Pfeffer and Robert I. Sutton published “The Knowing-Doing Gap.” This is what they wrote in the book’s Preface.

“… he (Jeffrey Pfeffer) noticed that there were more and more books and articles, more and more training programs and seminars, and more and more knowledge that, although valid, often had little or no impact on what managers actually did.

So, it was clear that knowing what to do was not enough. It was clear that being smart was not enough to turn knowledge into practice. It was evident that reading, listening to, thinking, and writing smart things was not enough.”

Remember I previously shared the book was published in 2000? Even though many read this book or heard about it, the knowing-doing gap persists. I hence concluded years ago that the world needs fewer people with all the answers and more people whose presence helps others flourish. And we do that by being virtuous, if we mean to.

The world needs fewer people with all the answers and more people whose presence helps others flourish.

And that is why Meaningful Purpose Psychology came to be: to reveal the role of meaning in human thriving to make it easier to mean to thrive and flourish.

A Different Question Changed Everything

While an important question, “What do we need to know?” we do not stop there. We ask a deeper question: “What helps people live according to what they already know?” That is why this science studies the meanings through which we understand ourselves, other people, and the world around us.

But what do I mean by meaning? It is something you and I do every single day. I’m not talking only about life’s ultimate purpose, although that’s certainly part of it. I’m talking about the meanings we assign every day – the way we interpret a conversation, explain a disappointment, understand another person's intentions, or decide what some response says about us. In other words, meaning is the understanding we create about ourselves, other people, and the situations we experience – and that understanding quietly shapes what we do next. We “mean” and then act based on an interpretative lens.

Through my studies and self-observation, I realized that I create meanings all day long, and I’ve rarely stopped to think about how meanings influence my life.

Social psychologists have shown for decades that two people can experience the same event and walk away with entirely different interpretations. One person sees hope, and another experiences criticism. One person becomes motivated, and another discouraged under the same circumstances. Notice that the information has not changed. The meaning has. That simple observation has fascinated me for years because it raises an even deeper question: How do those meanings develop, and why do they become so influential in shaping the lives we ultimately create and live?

Many assume that changing our lives begins by learning something new. What if instead it begins by asking a better question? Instead of asking, “What else do I need to know?” perhaps ask, “What meaning am I giving this situation?” That one question, I discovered, has the power to change how we see ourselves, other people, and many of the decisions we make every day.

So, what does logoteleology suggest? Well, it does not take an insurmountable decision to become a new and improved version of your person. Breakthroughs begin much more quietly by simply starting to learn how to ask better questions; those questions that help us become clearer and more centered with reality. Questions that help us understand the meanings guiding our lives. Questions that reveal wiser answers we can trust to direct the path we want to take.

I discovered that lasting growth isn’t always about filling our minds with more information. Rather, it’s about learning to see ourselves – and the world around us – with greater clarity.

Next time, when you find yourself ruminating, “Why did I do that? I know better!” You might be right. Life might be inviting you to find the answer. Just don’t stop at the question.

Take a Meaningful Pause

Before moving on with your day, consider this question:

What's one truth you've known for years but may need to see in a completely new way?

Don't rush to answer it. Sometimes the questions we continue to live with become the ones that gradually change the way we live.

Continue the Conversation

If you'd like to explore these ideas further, I invite you to join me for my upcoming free webinar, Discover What Sustains Healthier and More Meaningful Work Experiences. Together, we'll examine how the meanings we develop shape our work, relationships, leadership, and capacity to flourish—and how greater clarity can help us build healthier, more meaningful lives.

Learn more and register here:

Discover Here!